1. Know what you want. Your looks change and fade, character does not. While a certain amount of "chemistry" is nice, don’t rely solely on lust. What qualities are you looking for in a mate? My book "Find a Sweetheart Soon! Your Love Trip Planner for Women" helps readers define their love goals.
  2. Get clear about what you don’t want. Knowing what you really can’t tolerate in a partner is important. Make a list of your "don’t wants" and then cut it down to the 10 most important. Any more than that and you’ll be too picky.
  3. Live your life. Once you know clearly what you want (and don’t want) in a relationship, shift your focus to living your life. You’ll find that you start noticing those who might fit, and passing by those who don’t.
  4. See the big picture. Don’t try so hard that you miss the obvious. If you are great at focusing, step back now and then and look at the big picture. Work on having a playful, whimsical attitude towards life.

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